A Wetpaint Site | TV Fandex 100

Edison Class

Effective Introduction

Baiting the Hook

When you write, think about how you can use the first sentnece/paragraph to capture your reader's interest and make them want to read on. Keep in mind that some types of beginnings are better "bait" than others.

When you write, think about how you can use the first sentnece/paragraph to capture your reader's interest and make them want to read on. Keep in mind that some types of beginnings are better "bait" than others.

Powerful (one-sentence) leads

Sentence	Paragraph	Analysis of language/sentence structure

Sentence

Paragraph

Analysis of language/sentence structure

Descriptive lead Example: My grandma's room smelled of stale bread, dust , and forgetfulness. Effect: gives insight to the setting and character Non-example: My grandma stays in an old room.	Use a vivid, detailed description Example: Our father's parents lived in Pittsburgh; Amy and I dined with them, rather formally, every Friday night until dancing school swept us away. Our grandfather's name was, like our father's, Frank Doak. He was a banker, a potbellied, bald man with thin legs: a generous-hearted, joking, calm Pittsburgher of undistinguished Scotch-Irish descent, who held his peace. - Annie Dillard, An American Childhood What did the writer do?: The writer vividly describes her grandfather's physical character and personality.	Sentence 1: Compound sentence separated by a semicolon. Second independent clause has a compound adverb, set off by commas. Sentence 2: Sentence with an appositive set off by commas. Sentence 3: The first independent clause list items in a series that are separated by commas followed by coordinate adjectives set off by a colon and ends with an appositive that's set off by a comma.

Descriptive lead

Example:
My grandma's room smelled of stale bread, dust , and forgetfulness.

Effect:
gives insight to the setting and character

Non-example:
My grandma stays in an old room.

Use a vivid, detailed description

Example:
Our father's parents lived in Pittsburgh; Amy and I dined with them, rather formally, every Friday night until dancing school swept us away. Our grandfather's name was, like our father's, Frank Doak. He was a banker, a potbellied, bald man with thin legs: a generous-hearted, joking, calm Pittsburgher of undistinguished Scotch-Irish descent, who held his peace.

- Annie Dillard, An American Childhood

What did the writer do?:
The writer vividly describes her grandfather's physical character and personality.

Sentence 1:
Compound sentence separated by a semicolon. Second independent clause has a compound adverb, set off by commas.

Sentence 2:
Sentence with an appositive set off by commas.

Sentence 3:
The first independent clause list items in a series that are separated by commas followed by coordinate adjectives set off by a colon and ends with an appositive that's set off by a comma.


Problem Lead Example: As I was working late at the office, the lights went out, and I didn't have a flashlight. Effect: providing information about the problem piques the reader's curiosity Non-example: I was working late in the office.

Startling Fact The speed of a wave usually depends only on the source; kind of like gossip. Effect: (facts gathered from texts like science. math, or social studies) makes author sound like an authority or expert Non-example: Some people spread negative information fast.
Sentence	Paragraph
Quotation Example: My mom always told me to "kill my enemies with kindness." Another example(from a famous person): (can also be used as a conclusion) As President Theodore Roosevelt said, "far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing." One more example (from someone you admire): As my grandfather aways says, "Work is easy when you love what you do." Effect: (famous quote or a quote from someone you know) addresses the theme, main idea or topic also gives the writing authority Non-example Be nice to your enemies.	Quotation Example: "I had been living with dialysis for three years or so, and the new kidney felt like a new gift of life," said transplant patient Peter Wright. The work pf Samuel Lee Kountz, Jr. helped make this transplant and all modern kidney transplants possible. Effect: Sharing someone else's comment spark reader's interest. Non-example: Samel Lee Kountz, Jr. was born in 1930 in Lexa, Arkansas. He attended Arkansas Mechanical and Normal College and became a doctor. (See example of turning this into a question below)
	Paragraph

Question Example: Is there really such a thing as love at first sight Effect: (a thought-provoking question that addresses the topic, not the prompt) intrigues the reader and makes reader want to know the answer Non-example: Prompt:Write about someone important in your life. Have you had someone important in your life?	Ask a question (can also be used as a conclusion) Example: How did a young man who failed his college entrance exam go on to develop an important new kidney transplant technique? Why didn't he give up when he failed his college entrance exam? Another example: Where would you go if you were sixteen, and you and your friends didn't have much money? Would you hang around on a street corner - or would you watch videos, play basketball, or dance up a storm at a local youth center? Effect: The question get readers to see the writer's perspective on an issue. Asking a question also leaves the reader thinking about your topic.
	Paragraph
	Use an anecdote Example: I remember the first time the thought struck me! "There's something very wrong with our dinosaurs." I was standing in the Great Hall of Yale's Peabody Museum, at the foot of the Brontosaurus skeleton. It was 3:00 A.M., the hall was dark, no one else was in the building. "There's something wrong with our dinosaurs." The entire Great Hall seemed to say that... -Robert T. Bakker, The Dinosaur Heresies What did the writer do? The writer uses an anecdote to create an air of mystery. Effect: Telling a brief story that sets the specific tone or mood is an excellent way to hook readers.
	Paragraph

	Start in the middle or the end Example: In the time of April lilacs in the year 1865, a man in the city of Washington, D. C., trusted a guard to watch at a door, and the guard was careless, left the door, and the man was shot, lingered a night, passed away, was laid in a box, and carried north and west a thousand miles; bells sobbed; cities wore crepe; people stood with hats off as the railroad burial car came past at midnight, dawn, or noon. -Carl Sandburg, "Preface," Abrahm Lincoln: The Prarie Years Effect/"What did the writer do?" To create a dramatic effect, the write opens the preface of his biography at the end of Lincoln's life rather than at the beginning. Plunging readers into the thick of the action builds drama and engages readers..	Sentence: The writer describes season, year, the main character, the city, what the main character did, describes another character and what he did, described what happened to the main character, and described what happened as a result of the death of the main character and when all of these happened. He sets off an intorductory phrase, and lists of actions and time with commas and independent clauses with semicolons.

Start in the middle or the end

Example:
In the time of April lilacs in the year 1865, a man in the city of Washington, D. C., trusted a guard to watch at a door, and the guard was careless, left the door, and the man was shot, lingered a night, passed away, was laid in a box, and carried north and west a thousand miles; bells sobbed; cities wore crepe; people stood with hats off as the railroad burial car came past at midnight, dawn, or noon.

-Carl Sandburg, "Preface," Abrahm Lincoln: The Prarie Years

Effect/"What did the writer do?" To create a dramatic effect, the write opens the preface of his biography at the end of Lincoln's life rather than at the beginning. Plunging readers into the thick of the action builds drama and engages readers..

Sentence:
The writer describes season, year, the main character, the city, what the main character did, describes another character and what he did, described what happened to the main character, and described what happened as a result of the death of the main character and when all of these happened.

He sets off an intorductory phrase, and lists of actions and time with commas and independent clauses with semicolons.

OrlandoP	Latest page update: made by OrlandoP , Oct 8 2009, 5:23 PM EDT (about this update About This Update Edited by OrlandoP 1 word added 1 word deleted view changes - complete history)
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